the weekend hasn’t even started yet and i’m so tired already. as per usual, i blame hormones. drinking that big irish whiskey on the rocks after getting back from sacramento probably wasn’t the best idea, but rest in peace. it’s funny how after just seeing someone for maybe 30-40 times in my life and not saying much to them each time, you still get a sense of attachment. something about him gave me the sense that he was a kind man, always made me feel welcome from day one. and somehow knowing that he has known ernest all his life made him feel more like family. i burned a candle for him last night, one of xtine’s traditions, it felt nice. traditions are nice. it’ll be sad not to see him at thanksgiving this year.
been a long time and lots has happened, think i’m ready to come back, to finding my own voice. and excited for it 😀
had the urge to start a new blog, but since this one is deemed unsafe, it’s private enough. and how many blogs do i have floating out there. wish everything was in one place, but this is a good place to start/come back to.
so descriptive, all in so few words
may kasahara wrote a letter, talked about imagining herself as kumiko
toru okada reads chapter 8 of wind-up bird chronicle on cinnamon’s computer, is locked out of the rest of them, they are written by cinnamon
toru cannot get a hold of them, they seem to have disappeared
a lot of skinning and scalping, eek
bayta and toran go to kalgan – a place of luxury, hidden from what has happened outside, riches, superfluous (like singapore? crazy rich asians?)
they sit on the beach for middle class people, a court jester runs to them, says flowery words to bayta
then a guard comes to get him, he has run away from the court
this gives bayta and toran a chance to finally possibly get to see The Mule
just came off of a 3 day juice cleanse and dreamt that grabber a bunch of desserts at a buffet and deep down in my soul knew that I was ruining any progress I had made… we’ll see how the next three days goes. Why is it so hard just to maintain in middle age?!
dreamt R was back and helping me with random things, like filing some legal claim. Also dreamt that he has rescued a bunch mangy dogs again — 2nd time mangy mutts have appeared. the look on his face when he chowed them to me was one of true compassion and feeling. He also became sick and I went over to take care of him and didn’t wear a mask. was kind of sad to wake up and realize things are still in the state that they are. It was nice while it lasted.